Let's get started!

I'm Deb, an extremely overweight 48 year old.
Well that was a negative start... try again.

I'm Deb, a fun-loving, hard-working wife, mother and enthusiastic teacher who happens to also be morbidly obese. I nearly wrote 'overweight' there but those other 2 ugly words are the truth.
I was a heavy baby who was way above the 'average weight' line from a few weeks old. I have always been the biggest, heaviest, fattest kid in my class. I have no goal to be back to a certain weight e.g. the weight I was when I got married, because I have never, ever been a healthy weight. My family has all struggled with weight, but I am by far the heaviest of my parents and 3 sisters.
I grew up in a house full of great, home-cooked meals. Women in our family are judged by their cooking skills. Living on a farm meant easy access to cream, butter, full-fat milk, bacon, beef etc. Dad grew great vegies too. Dinners were always meat, spuds, veges, gravies etc and a delicious filling dessert as well. There were always multiple cake tins filled with amazing home baking. I was filling them by the time I was ten years old - and emptying them too!
I started Weight Watchers as a teenager with my mother. Dad went for a while too. We were all successful for short bursts. I've been at WW about 8 times I think. With that, plus trying the Atkins Diet and a few others, my weight has been a roller coaster for many years. This particular roller-coaster would dip down a bit for a while,. then climb up even higher. It never went to a healthy BMI. Or even to the overweight BMI. I've just fluctuated within the morbidly obese BMI range.
If you see me, you'll think weight is a huge part of my life because I look so huge. In fact, it isn't.

• I have been a very lucky, successful, loved person all my life. 
• I'm very healthy. 
• I've been happily married for 26 years, 
• I have fantastic relationships with my daughters (even when they were teenagers!!), sisters and parents
• I have always had great friends, even though we've lived all over NZ and Asia. Making friends is not hard for me.
• I adore teaching and have had lots of positive recognition as a great teacher.

So why can't I get this weight issue sorted out!!!!!

I'm not an emotional eater. I am a food addict. My portions are huge. I'm a secret, stealthy eater. If food is in front of me, I struggle to resist it.

Last year I lost 7.4kg in a couple of months, doing WW online by myself. I stopped for about 5 months and gained back about 2.4 of that weight.

Last October, at the school I work in, the nurses started a Biggest Loser Club where teachers could pay $50 to join and get weighed weekly in the nurses' office. I really wanted to join it but didn't because I was terrified of weighing in front of friends and colleagues. I worried that it would be too public and everyone would know my weight. By Christmas time I looked at a couple of people who had lost lots of weight  and thought, "Darn - I should have done that." I spoke with one of them who assured me that privacy is kept. I should have known that already - the nurses at work are awesome caring people.
So, in February when the nurses decided to start "Biggest Loser Part 2" I joined up. With fear and trepidation and hope and nerves and anxiety. Letting someone else see my weight on the scales was SO DIFFICULT.  Not some nameless weighing person at WW, but a colleague. She was amazing. She has been incredibly supportive. For seven weeks now I have been part of this group, and the nurse who weighs me has been my cheerleader. She emails me or finds me at work sometime each week to tell me how proud she is, and reminds me of how well I'm doing, and asks me if I notice how I am changing physically.
Other colleagues that are in this weight-loss club (including my boss!) have been so encouraging and positive. They are all trying to lose some weight, but nobody else is anywhere near my weight. I am so lucky to have all these people in my life.
My daughters and husband are incredibly supportive too. This week my 21 year old sent me a new swim suit with a note to say, "This is 6 sizes smaller than what you were wearing last year. They won't fit you yet, but don't be discouraged - they WILL fit you soon." What a great goal she has set me!
But... family,  friends and colleagues can't do it for me. I have to do the hard work.
And I have.
And I'm bloody proud of myself!
Not only have I been tracking every morsel that enters my mouth for 7 weeks, but I have exercised. Yes, I said that word... EXERCISED!! I have never, ever liked or taken part in sport. I hate exercise, especially in sweaty Singapore where I live. But, a good friend who came to visit 6 weeks ago (and is a Lifetime member of WW who has maintained her weight beautifully) saw the pool and gym at our condo and got me started. She showed me how to use the crosstrainer effectively, and to programme the stationary bike.  Then she gave me a few exercises to do in the pool. She did it all with me for 2 days, then flew home. But she has emailed me a couple of times a week to check my progress and encourage me. (I told you I have great friends!!)

So in 7 weeks I have lost 8.3kg.  The pants I wore to the first weigh in are too big - I slip them on without undoing them.
I can do 30-40 mins on the crosstrainer without falling off (could only do 10 mins at first)
I earn 40+ exercise points per week.
I think I can do this.
I feel fantastic.
I'm in control.
I'm not Wonder Woman yet, so I'm not about to wear my undies on the outside of my pants. But, I'm making good progress.

Since January 2009, I've lost 13.3kg. I don't want to find them again. Good riddance!